Long before The Family Concierge Collective existed, and before I ever imagined creating a business quite like this one, there was a thread running through much of my life and career.
People.
Understanding them. Listening to them. Looking beyond what is immediately visible and trying to understand what is really going on underneath.
It is something that has shaped both my professional life and my personal one.
A few years ago, it also led me to write a book, Guilt Free Self Love.
The book was deeply personal to me. I wrote about experiences from my childhood, my working life and my private life. I shared stories that weren't always easy to tell, alongside some of the lessons I had learned along the way.
At its heart was a very simple idea: we are allowed to value ourselves.
So many of us become incredibly good at looking after everybody else. We meet expectations, fulfil responsibilities, build careers, raise families and keep everything moving—often without stopping to ask what we ourselves actually need.
And when we finally do put ourselves somewhere on that list, guilt has an extraordinary habit of appearing.
Writing the book made me think a great deal about how we treat ourselves. But it also made me think about how we treat one another.
There is always more to a person than you first see
This is something I have learned repeatedly throughout my recruitment career.
A CV can tell me where somebody has worked.
It can tell me their qualifications, responsibilities and experience.
What it cannot tell me is who they are.
It doesn't tell me how they make another person feel. Whether they instinctively know when to step forward and when to step back. Whether they are kind without being intrusive, confident without being overbearing, or discreet when discretion really matters.
And a form certainly can't tell me whether I would trust that person in someone's home.
That requires conversation.
It requires listening.
And sometimes it requires asking a question and then being quiet long enough to hear the real answer.
That is the part of recruitment I have always loved.
The same is true of the families we work with
When somebody approaches us looking for help in their home, I don't simply see a vacancy to fill.
There is a reason they have contacted us.
Perhaps life has become exceptionally busy. Perhaps work involves constant travel. Perhaps they have a new baby, ageing parents, several homes or simply too many competing demands on their time.
Sometimes what a family is really looking for isn't merely another pair of hands.
It is breathing space.
It is knowing that someone capable and trustworthy is there.
It is being able to hand over part of the enormous mental load that comes with managing a home and family—and not feeling guilty for doing so.
That last part resonates with me enormously.
Because asking for support isn't a failure to cope.
Sometimes it is one of the wisest ways we can look after ourselves and the people around us.
Why I wanted The Family Concierge Collective to feel different
When Elisha and I created The Family Concierge Collective, I knew I didn't want to build a business where people became reference numbers in a database.
I have spent more than twenty years working in recruitment. Technology has transformed the industry during that time, and much of that change has been extremely useful.
But there are some things I don't believe should be automated away.
Human judgement is one of them.
I want to know the people we represent.
I want to speak to our clients and understand the household behind the job description.
I want candidates to feel that they have been listened to rather than processed.
And when I introduce somebody to a family, I want there to be genuine thought behind that introduction.
Not simply: Can this person do the job?
But:
Is this the right person for this particular family?
There is an enormous difference between the two.
Personal service isn't a marketing phrase to me
Perhaps this is where my book and The Family Concierge Collective meet.
On the surface, they are completely different ventures. One is about learning to value and care for ourselves; the other is about finding exceptional people to work within private households.
But underneath, they share something fundamental.
Both are about recognising the individual.
My experiences have taught me not to make assumptions about people too quickly. My career has taught me the value of listening. Writing Guilt Free Self Love taught me just how powerful it can be when somebody feels genuinely understood.
Those lessons now influence the business I am building.
When a client contacts me, I want them to speak to a person—not disappear into a system.
When a candidate trusts us with the next stage of their career, I want them to be treated with respect.
And when we make an introduction, I want both sides to know that somebody has genuinely thought about whether this could work.
That takes more time.
I'm comfortable with that.
Because when somebody is going to become part of the fabric of your home and family life, I think taking that time matters.
And ultimately, that is the kind of business I want The Family Concierge Collective to be.
Personal. Thoughtful. Discreet. And always, unmistakably human.
Debbie Willmott
Co-Founder, The Family Concierge Collective
Author of Guilt Free Self Love